Five reasons you don’t have to be grateful for your body.

I know, I know, we should all practice gratitude on a daily basis. I know, I know, we should all love ourselves and be thankful for the abundances in our lives. Sometimes, though, what you need more than gratitude is permission to say “!@#$ this all.”

Like when my brother died and someone told me that keeping a gratitude journal will help with my grief. “See God’s overall plan for joy in your life,” they said. What I needed was to shout “!@#$ this all!”

Or when I’m hiking a steep hill, doubled over, unable to breathe, and my buddy tells me, “hey, be grateful you have legs to carry you up this mountain.” What I wanted was to shout “!@#$ this all!”

Sometimes, we just need to say “!@#$ this all!”

As American Thanksgiving approaches, I’m seeing a lot more posts about giving thanks, having gratitude, and loving your body fully. I am all for appreciating the abundances in your life, but you know what? Some days, you just aren’t going to have !@#$s to give about gratitude. Some days, you just have to say “no thanks.”

We have this idea that to live a life of joy and gratitude you have to always be thankful for what you’ve got. (I have a stinking suspicion that idea came from people in power telling those without it to be happy with the small share they’ve been given.) The truth is, life is nuanced and therefore gratitude is nuanced as well. Some days you’ll have it and you’ll write down pages and pages of things you are thankful. Other days you’ll tell your gratitude journal to go !@#$ itself.

Having guilt over not being grateful defeats the whole purpose. So if giving thanks is hard for you this year, fret not. It’s okay to not be grateful.

Here are five reasons you don’t have to be grateful for your body:

insta_51. It’s fighting against you.

Your body is not always your friend. Sometimes your body is your enemy. See allergies, or auto-immune diseases, or cancer! Friggin’ cancer.

2. You’re constantly being told to despise it.

Advertisements are a bitch and sometimes you just don’t have it in you to fight the media machine.

3. It’s expensive and it is ruining your chances at financial success.

Think of how much money you would save if you didn’t have to eat. Or move. Or go to the friggin’ doctor.

And, if your body is a minority body, you’ll make a hell of a lot less money – 70 cents on the dollar for women, and half of that if you’re a person of color. Good luck getting hired if your body happens to have limited mobility, or if you dared to have a baby.

4. It never listens.

The cowlick on the back of my head that won’t lie dow. The fat roll I did a million sit-ups in high school to try to get ride of. The stomach that I beg every day to start being able to digest wheat and lactose again because dammit all I want is some macaroni and cheese. All my body’s fault. It just won’t listen to me.

5. It’s your body.

Your body is your body. You can love it, hate it, show it, cover it, or do with it whatever you please.


So yes, be grateful, give thanks, and practice seeing the abundances in your life when you can. But when you can’t, know that it’s totally okay to say “!@#$ this all.”

With love and light,



This post is a part of my countdown to the release of Bawdy Love: 10 Steps to Profoundly Loving Your Body, which comes out in just five days! Part workbook, part coloring book, and all kinds of inspiring, Bawdy Love is your friendly guide along the path of radical self-love.

Preorder your copy of Bawdy Love by November 30 and get:

  • Entered in the Bawdy Love giveaway to win over $1500 in prizes, including a spot at my Bawdy Love retreat! More on the giveaway – including all the ways you can get extra entries – here.
  • Free enrollment in my Silencing Your Inner Critic Course, complete with newly recorded guided meditations – a great companion to the book.
  • My Bawdy Breakfast and Daily Decadence special blended teas.
  • Inspirational postcards to send your friends – only available to people who preorder the book!
  • Special edition inspirational quotes from the book, hand-lettered by Liza Mana Burns for you to print out, color in, and post around your house.

These offers are only available if you preorder by November 30, so order today!

BookReleaseParty1Join the Bawdy Love Book release party on December 1!! Details on how to join from anywhere in the world here.









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